Why I Suck At Homeschooling - xoxo Rebecca

Why I Suck At Homeschooling


Have you ever tried to homeschool? If you have, you know it's pure, hard-core dedication. It's not easy nor is it stress-free! Homeschooling is far from easy going. I know first hand... I'm a homeschooling mom.

While I was making the graphic for this blog post, I asked my oldest what she thought of the title. I had two different ones. She laughed and said, "The one that says suck.....but why would you even write this?"

I laughed back and told her that it's because of how the issues have gone lately with our homeschool method and it's more to be funny... though the facts I'm about to state below, are indeed true.

It's true... I suck at homeschooling according to many of my peers. When we first began our homeschooling journey, I was alone. I had no one to talk to or ask advice on things. I just did all the research myself and spent countless searching on how to homeschool, what curriculum resources should I use, what my state laws were so I knew I was doing everything correctly.... and the list can go on and on.

It wasn't until a few months later I had it finally click in my head that I could resort to using Facebook as a resource for homeschooling. I knew there had to be local groups out there that we could join and meet up with to do activities with and to just become friends with. I then discovered there were lots of homeschool groups to join around the world.

This was the best thing I thought. So many resources and people with advice all at my fingertips. What could possibly go wrong? This was the best thing I thought that could happen to our homeschool days.

I soon discovered it was far from that. Though I have found some amazing deals and free resources I never knew existed, as well as some really great friends.....there seemed to be more bullies and meanies {is that a word?} in these groups then I expected.

I thought as homeschoolers, we were all in this together. But it seems like I was so wrong. I did not realize all the different types of homeschooling there was out there. I had already known about traditional homeschooling and unschooling. But there are literally tons of different homeschooling ways. And I soon found out that if you don't do it their way, you are not considered a homeschooler in their eyes and that is when the claws and hateful words come out.

So these are the reasons I suck at homeschooling according to my peers. 

1. My Child Is Learning Too Much
Yes, that is right. Apparently I was told by several women that I should be ashamed of how we homeschool because my daughter is learning too much in a day and that is known as child abuse. Their exact words and that I should be reported for such things. Homeschooling is not supposed to be cramming lots of education into a single day.

These comments came after I had commented on another moms' post about her child's work day. She asked what subjects do we all teach a day and for how long. Not even thinking anything of it, I decided to share my daily learning schedule I have my daughter do. That is when the poop hit the fan and I was being attacked left and right by several ladies telling me how I'm abusing my child by teaching too much.

I didn't know knowledge was child abuse but I guess that it is now. I did comment back that we are only doing the same amount of work that she would be doing in public school daily... they didn't like that comment any better. Which brings me to ....

2. Traditional Homeschooling Is Not Homeschooling
Yes, there are a lot of wars out there in the homeschool world of how if you are doing a traditional school method, then you really cannot call yourself a homeschooler. I got attacked first hand on this one when we decided to meet up with a local homeschool group. They were not happy with how we school and therefore were not very welcoming to myself nor my daughter.

The fact is, they said that if we were going to just do "school" at home, she might as well just be in public school and why waste my time calling myself a homeschooler. No matter how much I argued that a traditional school method at home works better for us and keeps us on schedule, they were not willing to budge on the fact I was not a homeschooler in their eyes.

3. Teaching What Your Child Doesn't Want To Learn Is Wrong
While I know so many people approach homeschool is a variety of ways and it works for them, I decided what method worked well for us. Since we do traditional school, I do push to cover all subjects and topics regardless if my daughter finds them boring or says she doesn't want to learn about such and such. I always tell her the same thing.... "You don't have to like it, you just have to know it."

And while yes, not everyone agrees with me, I do not think it is right to tell me I am wrong and a horrible parent for wanting my child to know what certain facts are even if she doesn't want to. Just because the War of 1812 really isn't appealing. Even for me to teach, it's honestly kind of boring and I LOVE history... I feel it's my job to make sure she is aware of certain things. I don't want her to be engaged in a conversation one day and the subject is brought up and when she's asked about it and asks, "what's that?" I don't want anyone making fun of her or saying how stupid homeschooled kids are.

This could be me being paranoid but right now, I feel like my number one job is to make sure she knows the boring as well as the fun stuff.

4. I Must Be Lying About What I Teach
I have heard this more times than I can count. As a homeschooler, I ask so many of my peers what they are teaching about and doing with their kids so I can get an idea of what I may be lacking in or didn't even think about. Since we are still new to this, I love engaging in conversations on what other kids my daughter's age are learning about. It gives me ideas of what I could do as well.

However, there have been several occasions where the conversation starts off good and then when they start listing what they teach and I start listing what I do....I am told that either I am really exaggerating on the subjects taught or that I really am just lying. I always give the same look every time. Why on earth would I be lying about this? It's what we do...we aren't going above and beyond. I feel if anything, we are sometimes not doing enough. But I hear so much that there is no way we are doing all that each and every day.

Why do people really care? I don't know. If I teach my child one subject or teach her forty subjects a day... that's not what is supposed to be the focus here. It's supposed to be the actual teaching itself. What we can share with each other and talk about that can inspire us to try out with our child.

5. My Child Is Not An Independent Learner
This one is hard because as any homeschool mom knows is that, some days it is hard to just sit down and work straight through with your child without you being able to get up at all. This is really hard for me because I also have two toddlers running around screaming for attention.

If I have to get up to attend to the little ones' needs, then my oldest stops her work. She just plain refuses to do it without me there to watch her work the entire time. While I feel the best part of homeschooling is that One-On-One teacher/student ratio we have going on, sometimes I wish I knew how to get her to be a little more independent when it comes to working on her own. 

Now I do not expect nor want to step away when we are learning a new subject or anything like that. But when she knows her multiplication and all she has are a few worksheets to complete, it does get hard to balance the little ones and her because all three are screaming for my attention. And I get more frustrated at my daughter because I know she does not need me to sit there over her shoulder while she completes the worksheets. If she were in public school, it would be the same. The teacher would have them work independently as well. So I need to figure out how to balance this with her and get her to be more of an independent worker when I am needed elsewhere.

6. I Cannot Figure Out How To Get My Little Ones Occupied During School Hours
This one always drives me crazy. I see all the time other homeschool moms bragging on how they are able to toss their little ones in a high chair, give them some toys and they are good to go for a few hours without making a sound. Or some do claim that their six month old can already read at a twelfth grade level and therefore is occupied with books all day.

I wish I knew their secret because I am clueless and stressed out to the max on how to keep my toddlers both occupied and quiet when it comes to school. No matter what I seem to do. I turn on the tv, give them the ipads, they have massive amounts of toys, they color... but all they seem to do is either fight non stop with each other or scream and cry their head off for my attention and want to destroy all our work we are doing at the moment.

I know some people are blessed with the fact their little ones take naps and that is when they can get some school work in peacefully. Not in my house. There is no nap time and I really wish there were. My little ones do not take naps to save any sanity I have left. I suck at trying to figure out how to keep them happy while homeschooling my oldest.

It seems like it takes us sixteen hours just to complete a four hour day of school because of it. I really would love to know how people do it. I need to know!

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These reasons are not made to put anyone down who's homeschool style may be different than my own. I support all my homeschooling friends. I have many that do the traditional method as we do.. I have lots who unschool, car school, earth school and so on...

And I think it's great that you all have the way that works best for you and I know you respect my ways as well. But this post was to just vent about those that seem to tell you how wrong you are and everything you are doing you suck at. Which is why I suck at homeschooling according to many in the Facebook groups I am in.

But it does not matter if your child is in public school, private school, homeschooled... as long as they are happy, healthy, and their minds are growing full of knowledge, we should stop putting each other down and start picking each other up and becoming a support team. Not a competition. 
xoxo Rebecca